Crockpot Taco Soup (and maybe a slight breakdown)

Since I'm riding the bench for the foreseeable future thanks to a super awesome bulging disc (more about this later), I'm having to be super careful about my caloric intake.  I'm not slaying it in the gym 5-6 times a week, so I can't eat like I was earlier this year (all good foods, but a little more volume to support my working out).  This.sucks.a lot.  So, to the kitchen I go, and in my world - the easier the better!  I made this on a whim today, and we may have a new addition to the Hutcherson Menu!

All I did was brown a pound of beef, and seasoned it with 1/2tsp coriander, 1/2 tsp cumin, 1/2 tsp onion powder, 1tsp garlic powder,1tsp chili powder, and S&P.   I didn't cook it all the way, and dumped it and the juice into my crockpot.  I then added a whole (chopped) orange and yellow bell pepper (I can't eat green and red, we do not get along), a chopped onion and a whole bag of shredded carrots (I may have overbought carrots when trying to make a cake this weekend...this overpurchase may have prompted this recipe).  The last addition was three cans of fire-roasted tomatoes.  Set on low and let simmer all day.  Top with avocado, a squeeze of lime - perfection!   The big kid also liked this, so that was an added bonus! **If you like a lot of flavor, which I do, I would add the above spices again and stir in before cooking.  It needed more punch, I thought!**

I won't win any photography awards with this picture, but it was super yummy!

Back to my back.  I am about to head to the pool so I won't stay on here to complain too long, but it effing SUCKS to have this issue.  Like, I'm full on wanting to throw a huge temper tantrum about it.  I already deal with chronic back pain due to my crooked back, but this is a whole other level that I was and am truly not prepared to deal with.  It's so hard to have my workout plan for Hawaii completely wiped out, and for me to swallow the "it will be a 6-8 month recovery" news.  Seriously?  I'm trying to not totally lose my shit over all of this, and I know in the grand scheme of things it will be ok, but right now I just want to kick and scream.  It's already hard enough to keep from blowing up to 400 lbs, and now I have to be hyper vigilant about what goes in my mouth because I'm not able to do much more than walk in the water.  Some days...life ain't fair.  Whomp Whomp.

Another great recipe!

**This recipe is from The Frugal Paleo Cookbook - I highly recommend purchasing this book!!!**

This is a recipe I've made several times, and every.single.time we end up with none left over.  I even DOUBLED the recipe, and Sean ate it all.  As in, like 9 thighs, plus veggies.  How he is not 500 lbs, I will never know.  I just pray my boys got his metabolism, and not mine.

Crispy Chicken with Lemon and Capers

2 lbs of chicken thighs

2 tbs of House Seasoning (2 tsp garlic, 2 tsp of onion powder, 1 tsp of cayenne (or paprika if cayenne is too spicy), and 1 tsp black pepper)

1 tsp kosher salt

2-3 tbsp olive oil

1 tsp capers

1 lemon (or lime - both work)

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.  Trim excess fat/hanging skin off of thighs.  Season the skin side with the House Seasoning and salt and set aside

Heat cast iron pan to medium-high and add olive oil.  If there won't be about an inch or so in between each thigh, work in batches.  Attempting to squish them all in there will steam them instead of sear them.  

Sear the chicken for 2-3 minutes, and then I place them in a glass baking dish.  I am always working in batches, so one big dish works for me.  I sear all the chicken and then add the olive oil/cooking juice to the pan, season the other side and roast for 30 minutes.  

After the 30 minutes is up, remove the chicken, add the capers and squeeze a big lemon or lime all over.  Serve and enjoy!  We like baked cauliflower (I season it with the House Seasoning, EVOO and salt) or sauteed zucchini and squash with it!  

Make sure to pour some of the juice over the chicken - it's the best part!!!

Aloha Sliders

*Disclaimer - this is not my recipe.  I copied it verbatim from The Frugal Paleo Cookbook.  If you have not purchased this cookbook, well...you are crazy and you should go to Amazon and do so right now.  That is all.

I am trying really hard to continue my good eating habits I (re)established during my last Whole 30.  Meal planning is key for this, because if I don't have a plan I just grab something and it is usually not good for me.  I did not plan as well as I normally do this weekend because it's been full of birthday craziness, so I'll try and scrounge up the energy hopefully tomorrow.  If not...it will be a lot of eggs.  And chicken.  Because, #chickeniseasy.

I made these sliders tonight for us (not the kids - they wanted pizza and I'm here to please), and I'm glad I ate mine first because Sean ate the rest at an alarming rate.  The prep time was totally doable during the week, and cooking was even easier since Sean fired up the grill for me.  Fact about me - I don't grill.  I'm afraid of it, it's not a controllable thing, it's not gonna happen probably in this lifetime.  Another thing to note about this recipe - if you want leftovers, go ahead and double this recipe.  I'm already pissed that Sean ate my lunch for tomorrow.

Aloha Sliders with Pineapple Relish

For the relish:

2 tbsp coconut oil

1 small red onion finely diced (or, buy the already diced onion if you hate prepping)

1 jalapeno, seeded and finely diced (wear gloves and don't touch your face.  I may know this by experience)

zest from a lime (I just used lime juice.  I don't get the zesting..seemed hard)

1/4 tsp sea salt (or salt.  I mean...whatever)

1 1/2 cups of pineapple (so I used a can of chunks.  I refuse to cut up a pineapple.  Ain't nobody got time fo' that.)

1/4 cup chopped cilantro (I just ripped it up.  Sean didn't complain)

Grab your large pan, turn your stove top to medium heat and melt the coconut oil.  Then add the diced onion, jalapeno, lime zest and salt.  Sautee until the onions are almost translucent.  Next, add the diced pineapple (if you are awesome like me and use a can, make sure to drain the juice first).  Take your time, and keep the temp around medium, or you will burn it.  It takes about 30 mins, so make sure you check frequently and stir often.  When it's nice and saucy, remove from heat, add cilantro, cover and wait for the sliders to be ready.

For the sliders:

Ground Pork - 1lb

1 garlic clove - minced

1/4 cup chopped cilantro

1/4 cup diced red onion

1/2 tsp cumin

1/2 tsp kosher salt 

While the sauce is cooking, combine all of the ingredients in a large bowl and mush together.  Form your slider patties, beg your husband to make sure the grill is ready and hand him the plate and tell him it's his turn.  Oh wait...that was me.  I mean, if you can handle this part just take them to the grill, cook on one side for 5-6 mins, and flip.  Cook that other side for 4-6 minutes and they should be perfect.  Bring them inside, top with the amazing relish and start eating.  I would go ahead and make your leftover lunch tupperware first so your husband doesn't know there is extra available.   We didn't have a side with this, and didn't really need it.  The flavors were super fresh and the relish had just a hint of spice, but nothing this spice hating girl couldn't handle.  

I hope y'all enjoy this recipe as much as I did this evening!  

So, now what?

So, you've finished your Whole 30.  Now what?

Well...there are a few options, and all of them I've explored.  Let's discuss.

1.  Go wheels off back to where you started.  Trust me.  This is sooooo easy to do, and I would never judge anyone that this happens to.  Whole 30 is the most strict food plan (refuse to say diet) I've ever followed.  It's tough to read labels, prep menus, cook all the food, never have a drink, be a poster W30'er.  I have NEVER completed a perfect (by the books, that is) Whole 30, and it's a personal goal of mine to.  However, just like with anything worth doing, if it were easy it would just be "the way".  I went back to my old ways quicker than lightning after my 2nd W30, and I paid the price.  I screwed up my digestive system big time.

2.  Continue the Whole 30 plan for an extended stretch.  I did this after my first go around, and I almost guarantee I was able to recover from surgery (two, actually) at a much faster rate because of all the good foods I was eating.  It was hard, but so worth the sacrifice to let my body heal.  I got to the lowest weight I've been since college during this time, and was lifting and training at an all time high.  However, I got burnt out and let old habits creep in.  Before I knew it, I was back to my old ways.  It truly happened without me even realizing it.

3.  Find a happy medium. This is the current place I'm living in right now.  Since I am once AGAIN out of the workout game (thanks, bulging disc), I have to be careful about what foods I'm consuming because I have the superpower of being able gain weight at an extremely rapid rate and I can't do much to counteract it at the moment.  I also just feel better when I don't consume the dairy/sugary things.  I had a tall flat white from Starbucks today as a "treat", and my body all but rejected it immediately.  I just need to listen to these cues and realize that I can't just shove whatever I want in and expect it to be ok.  It's a hard lesson to learn, and one I feel will be a life battle.  Some days I just don't care, but then I pay the price.  I mean, I'll get it some day, right?

How I stay motivated during and afterwards:

I buy myself presents.  I know, it's ridiculous.  I'm not above a toddler sticker chart, either.  I'm very visual, so if I can see cumulative awesomeness, it helps push me to continue building good habits.  I always buy myself a "mid" present (this year it was a cookbook and a spiralizer) and an end present (new necklace), with manicures and such thrown in between to keep it fun.  This time I gave myself an extra challenge of hitting a certain amount of workouts during, and the weeks just flew by.  I would say this was my most successful one yet!  I lost 7 lbs and lots of inches (I need to tally those up).

When I've been most successful with Whole 30, I've also surrounded myself with people that are participating and/or understand my goals.  I've joined Facebook groups, and have group texts with people who can understand my "I just want a glass of wine" text really means "I just need to complain for just a minute, but that's it" haha!  I love talking about it because it can truly be fun and you learn so much!  I mean, I'm eating brussels sprouts now after this W30 - that's CRAZY!  I hated those nasty little things before, and now I can't get enough.  I post pictures of my food, and let my social media platforms keep me accountable.  Before you know it, the 30 days will be up!

I hope that these posts are helpful.  If you have any questions, please ask!!

Oh, hey...

Hi Friends!

It's been a long time since I wrote anything, and I've felt bad about that.  I hate editing myself, and I struggle with what to put out there vs. what not to.  So, this post will be pretty surface material type of things.  I have had a lot of requests for menus/menu planning/how I do Whole 30s, etc - so here ya go!

I completed my third Whole 30 this past week, and just like the previous two times it was very successful for me.  The holidays are always like a sprint for me, full of family and friends and fun.  I love it, but it's exhausting and full of questionable food and drink choices.  By the end of December, I looked like a bloated train wreck and I knew it was time to clean up my act.  My skin was out of control, I had dark circles for days and I just looked poofy.  I hadn't really worked out much, either, and I was ready to recommit myself to a solid routine.  Some advice I have about Whole 30 is that there will NEVER be a 30 day period that is perfectly perfect for you to do this, so you just need to suck it up, buttercup.

I also always start my Whole 30s with a 10 Day Cleanse from Advocare.  I don't sell it, it's not a "thing" for me - but I do love this cleanse and I always feel better afterwards.  It's easy to have success because I'm already eating clean, too.  I just think giving yourself a chance to have really great results in the first ten days is just a great way to motivate yourself for the next 20.

I started on a Monday, and so that Sunday I meal planned and cooked as much as possible.  This is what my weekends look like, and how I am able to achieve good food choices for the week:

Saturday/Sunday - I do a lot of preplanning for these two days.  I love to look for recipes during the week (I often email the links to myself), and so over the weekends I show them to Sean and have him pick a few that he likes (and possibly cook for us).  If I need a big protein run, I typically head to Costco. Besides the normal items, they also have things I love like the 505 Hatch Green Chilies, and big things of strawberries so a trip there every other week becomes a necessity.  If I am not shopping there, I am at Kroger.  I write everything down, and also list what recipes I want to cook.  I can.not.cook.on.the.fly.  I just can't.  It stresses me out, I get overwhelmed, I shut down.  I can, however, follow a recipe like a champ, so to have all of this planned out works great for me.

It's all about me...I hope you are following that.  ;)

Anyhoo, once I get my stuff home the fun begins.  I use Whole 30 as a way to try new things, but I ALWAYS have staples ready to go.  I eat a lot of eggs, avocado, chili, and soups.  I am so lucky to work close to my home, so going home for lunch is really easy and keeps temptation at a minimum.  My meal plan for the week usually looks like this:

• Egg Cups - I love to make these with lots and lots of veggies and ground beef.  If I am feeling fancy, I will wrap prosciutto around the cups.  I just scramble 8-10 eggs and set aside.  I will sautee bells, mushrooms, spinach and add that to the bottom of the cupcake tin.  If I'm adding beef, I spoon a little on top, and then pour the egg in.  I like to use Sean's taco seasoned meat for extra flavor.  We don't use packaged seasoning packets EVER.  There is typically so much gross stuff in them, and they always make me sick.  Sean is my seasoning master.  I just let him do his thing
• Turkey Blueberry Meatballs - this is a new favorite, and something I will probably eat forever.  Two meatballs is more than filling with two fried eggs (current obsession), and a great post workout breakfast or a snack.  One recipe usually makes enough for the entire week, and they freeze really well, too.  I substituted onion powder for actual onion and I think the consistency was a little better. I also used blackberries and they were awesome.  Go heavier on the sage and thyme.
• Soups and Chili's - This is usually my go-to lunch, and I don't get that mid-day carb crash that I typically would after a normal lunch.  It's easy to cook a big batch of these recipes, and I can get lots of meals from one pot.  I loved this new Buffalo Chicken Soup (I would add more chicken next time, and I didn't shred it, I cut it in chunks), and I also liked this Sweet Potato Chili  because you can make it in your crock pot!!  This is usually something I make just for me because the boys don't like casseroles/soups and Sean thinks the only good chili is the one he makes (which is sorta true - again, he can throw down in the kitchen, too).
• Crock Pot meals - Really a must for any mom.  Again, my boys hate casseroles and things that touch (lord help me) so I have to get creative.  I also don't short order cook too much, so if Sawyer wants something else he's welcome to make a sandwich.  Independance.  It's a beautiful thing.  Some meals that we enjoyed this past W30 were the Chili Lime Roast and Kippy's Pork Carnitas.  

Something that I wish I had purchased months ago is The Frugal Paleo Cookbook and Paderno Veggie Spiralizer.  I absolutely love these two things and urge everyone to purchase them immediately.

So, here is the dirty about me and Whole 30.  I'm never perfect on them.  There is a book (It Starts with Food - very informative) and it says if you intentionally choose to go off plan that you should start over.  I never do, and I don't care.  If I have two bad meals in 30 days, I figure that's good enough for me and I don't stress.  I'm not saying to break the rules intentionally, but don't beat yourself up, either.  My first W30 I had sugared coconut almost every day without even realizing it.  I chalked it up to a lesson about reading labels and moved on.  Its hard enough being a woman/mom/working person - I don't need to beat myself up over this, too.

Plan, plan and plan.  Always have an emergency Larabar ready.  Learn to socialize without a drink in hand.  Eat before events or bring your own food.  If you are lucky enough to have friends as badass as mine are, you are lucky enough to have people who accommodate your weird eating issues anyway so this shouldn't really rock their world too much.  Don't make it a big issue and it won't be.  Have fun with it and you can learn a lot of new things about food and about yourself.  

So, what should I write about next?

Don't Dismiss Me.

This will be a rant, so you are officially warned.

I had my scoliosis specialist visit and I have NEVER felt so disrespected in my life.

I had such peace about today, and I really felt pretty good about it all.  I'd done a significant amount of research and really was ready to sit down and talk to someone and decide a plan of action.  Anyone that knows me, knows how much I love a good plan.  It's how I roll.  I need one, and I need all the people to have one, too.  I was ready to plan today, and to finally figure out how to tackle the problem that is my back (my neck, my back...my neck and my back).

The appointment started off on a rather sour note.  My chiropractic office gave me x-rays that were from 2012, thus rendering them null and void for usage today.  I was and still am VERY upset by this.  Their mistake cost me not only almost $300, but more importantly required me to have another set of x-rays taken.  If you have been keeping count, that would be the third set in less than six weeks (along with a CT scan, too).  I am in no way against x-rays, but I am against the repeated exposure to radiation.  I have had 6 shots done total, and I just feel like that is way too much.  I have expressed my severe displeasure to my chiro office and am waiting to see how they respond.  This is a very serious mistake in my book, and one that I need some sort of restitution on.

So, there was that. I had another round of 'ray's, and sat and waited...and waited...and waited.  We waited almost an hour, and only then did the P.A. come in.  He was so nice, and attentive, and really was listening to me and my story.  I know I'm a weird case - has ANYTHING ever gone normally for me (the answer to that is noppppeee).  I just want someone to listen to me, because I have a lot to say and it all matters.  That's not being an asshole, that's just the truth.  The P.A. was doing a pretty good job and it and then the door flew open.

Dr. H, or whom I presumed to be Dr. H since he couldn't be bothered to introduce himself, came flying through the door and interrupted our conversation.  He started with "I heard you were in a car accident".  Well, yes, I said, I was, but that isn't the whole reason I'm here...at a scoliosis specialist.  He said, "Well, the scoliosis didn't just pop up overnight, so I guess that wasn't a surprise."  Um...thanks Captain Obvious - we all know this crooked back didn't just happen because I slept wrong.  I'm sitting there dumbfounded, really confused by this terrible man's horrendous bedside manner when he goes into "Well, your 40 degree curve isn't something I'll be concerned with, so let's just get you some painpills and send you on your way."

Pump.  The. Brakes.

I'm going to digress just a little bit, but THIS IS WHY AMERICA HAS AN EFFING PILL PROBLEM.

This man, who knows nothing about me and that I bet couldn't pick me out of a lineup, just gave me the keys the to the pain pill kingdom. Just like that.  Never looked a chart, didn't ask any questions, nothing.  He also prescribed Flexeril, which is an extremely potent muscle relaxer.  I've already been prescribed that once before, and spent the next three days in a complete haze because of it.  I can't take it and also participate in life, there is just no way.  Mom and I both were like, are you serious?!  Last time I took that stuff, I slept upwards of 18 hrs a day!  Not really conducive to being a wife, mom, employee...I'd be in bed asleep!

I'm in tears at this point, crying and saying "but...I can't walk?  I'm having a hard time functioning? This can't be normal for a 32 year old woman."  I was told that the pills would help, and that he couldn't believe I wasn't on anything already.  Like I was crazy for wanting to try and do things without drugs.

I was so mad, and it took every ounce of my being not to lose my shit.  I mean, it really took a LOT.  I felt so hurt and dismissed.  How is someone who doesn't know me going to tell me that my curve isn't worth being concerned by.  Do you have a curvy back?  Do you struggle to chase your kids?  Do you want to spend more time than normal in your bed because it's just easier?  I am going to guess he doesn't.  This is not a situation where being told to rub some dirt on it and get back in the game is going to be sufficient.  I did not take off work, spend my time and money and drag my mother along to have some asshole not help me.

After he felt annoyed by our drug questions (which I don't plan on taking unless it just gets unbearable, and even then - I am just not sure), he flippantly said I should get some PT and waltzed out of the room, probably off to check on a patient that has a bigger, more important curve.

The P.A. wrapped up stuff, but I don't really remember what he said.  I was just so frustrated I was leaving there without a thing - a reason for the pain, a way to help, nothing.  Even the stupid receptionist was a bitch about things.  I'm sorry that I live in Arlington, heaven forbid I would like to see a PT out there.  It was just all around a mess.

So...I'm basically where I was yesterday, except I have a diagnosed insignificant curve not worth anyone's concern and $527 more broke.  I'm pissed, hurt, frustrated and most of all just tired.  It makes me so mad that someone could be so mean.  I am not a hypochondriac.   This is real, and it really needs to be fixed.  I don't want surgery, that is the last resort for me. I just want to get back to life.

My mother in law has a plan for me, and now I just need to get down to Salado and meet with the guy she says will change my life.  That is tentatively planned for a few weeks, so that's the new plan.  Until then, my insignificant curve and I will keep on keepin' on...that's all we can do.  Please understand that right now I'm not in a really great place, and I'm trying to keep my head above water.

but...you look fine?

I am a horrible blogger.  Life, in all of its beautiful craziness, has taken over and I've been doing my best to take it all in.

If you missed my over postings via Facebook and Instagram, here is the Cliff's Notes version of the last four months:

• Sean and I decided to take a trip to Vegas for a friends wedding, which prompted me to start #projectvegas - an all out attempt to get in shape and be super hot for Sin City.
• This all out attempt was thwarted by several illnesses, but I was able to log in on average 4-6 workouts a week with intense weight sessions.  I was seeing results and feeling really good about things.  
• On April 1, I was involved in a hit and run accident which scored me a sweet ride in the ambulance, a short visit to Arlington Memorial and a migraine that lasted well over a week.
• From that accident, I have suffered from intense back and neck pain daily/hourly/to the minute.  
• On April 11th, we did make that trip to Vegas.  It was rough, but I wouldn't trade seeing my friend get married for anything!  I just really had a rough time with the walking/standing.  It was not my favorite vacation.
• I've begun chiropractic/PT care, but have decided to visit with a scoliosis specialist to visit the all scary back surgery.  This is the part where I want to vomit everywhere.

I hate being the victim.  I actually dislike reading about people who paint themselves as the victim, too, so that's a big reason why I haven't said much about the pain I've been in.  It's bad, y'all.  It is all day, errrr day and it's affecting my daily life.  It makes me a huge bitch, very short tempered, extremely emotional and probably borderline unstable at times.  Actually, it's somewhat similar to how I behaved on all those fertility drugs I had to take a few years back, so if you remember that - I'm sorry.  It's a roller coaster of emotions that I have yet to get a hold over.  A friend Monday night said her husband told her to "lock it down" (when referencing her tears due to her emotional thank you speech), and I should probably take that advice at times, too.  I'm trying to be as honest as possible with the ones that I love, because I can be extremely short and no one has ever accused me of being overly sweet to begin with.  It most likely has nothing to do with you (or maybe it does?  Don't be an asshole haha), and I just caution all that you never know what you will get.

For those who don't know, I suffer from scoliosis.  Most people don't know this about me because I just haven't really said much about it.  Most cases (like mine) are caused by unknown reasons, and I have a pretty severe "S" curve in my back. I believe my top curve is around 40 degrees, and the lower one around 30 degrees in the opposite direction.  My right shoulder slumps down significantly, and one of my hips is higher than the other.  With all of that said, at first glance you probably wouldn't notice how out of whack I am.  I've adapted quite nicely over the past 15 years or so, and I am "lucky" that I don't look crazy...yet.  I have noticed, however, that things are changing a little more rapidly than I'd prefer.  The car accident on April 1 didn't help anything, either.  

What I am dealing with is a true disability, but an "invisible" one.  It is really hard for me to use the word disability, but it is the best term I can come up with.  Since the accident, my pain level has gone up.  I can't pick up the kids, I can't sit in a chair, I have difficulties walking after only a few minutes and working out has slown down to only include riding the recumbent bike.  I'm having a hard time with this whole situation.  I worked my butt off to lose weight and become more active with the kids, and now I can't do much of anything.  I finally decided to meet with a scoliosis specialist, because I am at my wits end.

So, the specialist visit.  I have thought about this visit for years.  With a 40 degree curve up top, and an almost 30 degree curve the other direction in my lower spine, it was only a matter of time before I started feeling the way that I do.  The car accident sure didn't help anything, either.  I felt like I was managing it ok with working out consistently, but I can hardly do anything other than ride the stupid bike.  I'm eating Advil like they are skittles, and really feeling no relief.  I'm good if I take a hydrocodone or two, but I'll also be asleep for 18 hrs that day so I can't do that very often.  I found a blog about a young girl that had this surgery (Her Scoliosis Journey) and cried reading the whole thing.  I can relate to pretty much everything she's gone through, and see that if I don't do something soon it will only get worse.  This surgery is so serious, though.  It will change everything.  I have tears in my eyes just typing those words.  I have no idea what the doctor will say, but I keep preparing myself for "you need to do it".  Those are some big words.

This surgery doesn't affect just me, either.  Sean..my mom...my kids...my work...my life.  This changes everything for them, too.  How do you make a decision that huge, with the possible outcome of death/paralysis?  It's just so insane.  My initial recovery, just to get out of bed, would be around six months.  SIX MONTHS.  What.the.hell.  On the flip side, what if I give up these six months and get my life back?  I've read about girls training for marathons after this surgery.  Now, I'm pretty sure I just don't want to do that in general - but I could if I wanted to after this surgery!!!  I guess I just hope to have a clearer picture of the whole situation next week after my visit.  I need a plan.

I'll leave you with this...please, if you pray (or if you don't, just send up a shout out anyway), can you send some good ones up for me?  My visit is next Wednesday.  Also, please pray for my sweet family - they sure don't deserve to deal with this, but they are doing so with tremendous understanding and grace.  I am very lucky to have them.  Also, huge thanks to my friends for understanding and loving me through this, too.  I know I'm a lot to deal with on a good day, and I appreciate you very much.