I'm fluent in Food

It's really no secret I love food.  I associate food with fun, I like to eat out with friends and one of our favorite date night events is to go eat out somewhere new and different.  I worked in the beverage industry for five years, and that allowed me to explore cuisine I might not otherwise had an opportunity to try.  I also learned a lot about food pairings, and how a simple glass of wine can take a meal to a whole different level.

I guess you can say I'm fluent in food.

I love most anything, and will try anything once.  I've eaten at the finest restaurants, the dirtiest hole-in-the-walls and everywhere in between.  I survived living in another country and not speaking the language.  I'm pretty fearless in my food choices and enjoy those who can be adventurous, too.

With this love affair, however, comes the fall out.  How I use and used food as a coping mechanism.  Whenever I was sad/tired/overwhelmed/depressed, I'd instantly head for the pantry for a little something to help myself feel better.  Another bad thing I'd do was beat myself up after certain meals or poorly executed diet plans.  I would feel ashamed for not having any self control over the amount of food I'd consume and what was supposed to be a beautiful experience would quickly turn into a mental game of "You're Not Good Enough".

Bottom line is, your value as a person should never be associated with what you eat.  Thinking you are better or worse than someone else because of the choices you make at breakfast/lunch/dinner is so damaging to the soul.  Beating yourself up after having a meal full of less than stellar choices is not helpful, either.  You shouldn't treat yourself like a petulant child.  Instead, you should be proud of who you are as a whole - not just for what you had for supper.

There are choices in life.  Some are good...some are meh, probably could've done something a little smarter and then there are the ones that fall in the "What in the HELL was I thinking" category.  I, for one, am so glad Facebook didn't exist for a lot of my choices that fall into that last box, but that's what they are - just choices.  They aren't failures, they are just places where I could've chosen better or realistically, just differently.  If I were to say I failed every time I made one of those choices, I'd be a miserable, lonely person who did nothing.  So, why would I said I failed at things such as "I ate a bowl of ice cream".  As I have become more fluent in the language of food, the gluten-free version, I'm finding myself having a more positive look at things and wanting to be on the positive side of life.  Instead of beating myself up about no longer being able to enjoy flour tortillas and donuts, I am remembering the way they make me feel and how proud I am that I've finally figured that out.  Have a taken a bite of donut since this recent discovery - you betcha.  Did I feel awful?  TOTALLY.  But, I didn't let it get me down.  It didn't ruin my food choices for the rest of the day, either.  I didn't go on a gluten binge because I'd already had one bite, so I mine as well keep on going.  That, my friends, is huge for me.  I feel like I've come so far, and I like who I see in that mirror more and more every day.

I think everyone should become fluent in food, it's an amazing thing.  Some of my favorite memories involve food, and I know that I have many more memories waiting to be made.  Just remember that food is just food and that food choices (good or bad) don't define you as a human being.  Life is about so much more, and I think we should all remember that.

Adjustment

I'll start this post with a picture of my back.  Just to get the party started, ya know.  

I've got 99 problems, and a straight spine ain't one...

I've suffered from Scoliosis for about half my life, I think.  I honestly don't remember a time it wasn't an issue.  I'm more than thankful that my parents did NOT opt to place two metal rods in my back or any other crazy surgery they had 15 or so years ago.  I can only imagine how awful that would be.  

I'm pretty lucky, as far as spinal things go, that my vertebrae aren't smashed together and causing even more issues.  My spacing is still there, but Dr. Cindy said if she didn't know this was my x-ray, she would honestly think it was from someone much older.  The body is also an amazing thing - if I didn't show you this picture or show you my "off-ness" (slumped shoulder, one arm appearing longer than the other, etc) you'd probably never know I had this crazy curvature in my back.  I'm cool with how I look now, but my fear as I get older is that I'll be that hunched back old woman.  It truly freaks me out.  I'm way too cute to be a hunchback. 

Have I mentioned how much I like Dr. Cindy and her chiropractic approach?  I've been too one too many quacks, and to say I was hesitant to go to a "granola doctor" (said with all the love in my heart...now) would be an understatement a few months ago.  I really tend to respond to true physical therapy and sports massages best to relieve the almost constant pain I have from my spine.  The quacks tend to yank my neck around, crack it really loud and send me out the door, in no better shape after than I was before.  Dr. Cindy and Co. (from what I can tell thus far) really steer clear of that type of "treatment" and use more PT type of exercises to help their patients.  My biggest issues come from my C7, T8 and L3.  When you look at the list of things they are connected to, it all begins to fall into place.

C7:  Thyroid gland, bursa in the shoulders, elbows - weird, had the thyroid issues and my elbows used to pop all the time and stopped after I was adjusted.

T8:  Spleen, stomach, liver, pancreas, gallbladder, adrenal cortex, small intestine, pyloric valve - well, my poor liver barely survived college, but that wasn't my back's fault.  I have a super touchy stomach, too.  T8 is where the curve is at its worst.

L3: Uterus, bladder, knees, large intestine - hahahahaha seriously?  unhappy, useless, worthless and hateful would be words to describe these.

So, there ya go.  Dr. C has me on fish oil (strawberry lime flavored?  totally bizarre  but whatevs.  I'll take it over tasting like fish) and this other supplement called Simplex F for the time being to see how I do.  Simplex F focuses on healthy production of female hormones and helps promote healthy metabolism.  It also helps with proper thyroid gland function, too.  I hate taking pills, and I'm having to set alarms on my phone to remind myself to take these things, but I'm willing to make the commitment to see if I can turn out of Crazy Town and get back to "normal".  Dr. C said I looked a lot more at peace with things, and was happy I removed that Nuva-ring.  Honestly, I am so glad I did, too.  I'm down to 212, having great runs at the gym and lifting more weight than I was a few weeks ago.  I'm anxious to see if I can keep up this weight loss jump, and finally get out of the 200s.  I know it took years of poor food choices, having babies and hormonal imbalances to get to where I was, but it does feel good to know I'm finally on what I feel is the path back to overall health for myself.  I'm only two pounds away from my next mini-goal, and I can't wait to buy myself some new workout pants when I hit it!  Maybe I can get there by this week, so I'll be extra fine just in time for family pictures on Sunday.  That would be awesome!!  

Honored Hero 5k and a PR!

5k number two is in the books, y'all - with a Personal Record!  Ok, so - I only had one time to beat, but I did it!  I really didn't think I would, either.  It was soooo windy, and I was having a hard time struggling through that.  I found my crew of "slow-timers" and stayed pretty consistant on my pace.  I am still having a hard time getting adjusted to running outside and weaving in and out of people.  I feel like I need to start training in the mall so I get used to herds of people milling about.

I won't lie - I was WAY less prepared for Sunday's race than I was my previous one.  I didn't eat enough carbs and I definitely didn't hydrate properly.  It was probably for the best Madonna cancelled her Saturday concert (NOT FAIR), so I did get a decent amount of sleep, but I totally could've gotten my act together a little bit better.  The prior week's worth of drama was enough to get into my head around Mile 2, and I know I slowed down to a snails pace fighting those internal battles.  It was a super fun race and I had a good time, though.  I'm just ready to run when it's not 85 and muggy.  I think I actually liked running in the rain a little bit better!  At least I wasn't hot!

Official Time: 45:10:37  I beat 90 people!  Let's not talk about the 300 that beat me.  :)

Me and m'coach - she's the best!  She ran the half, and started dancing with the crowd right after she was done.  I'm not sure I was breathing normally yet, and I finished a good hour before she did.  

Anyhoo, how quickly my life has changed and my focus has shifted to finding more races instead of excuses.  Looks like I'll be doing two races in November and the Jingle Bell Run in December!  I even had a dream last night where I ran a half marathon of my own.  Trust me, this is a FAR AWAY dream, but if I've learned anything in the last few months it's to never say never.  Stranger things have happened...

Balance

Hi, friends.

I've been meaning to write this post for a few days, but I just couldn't bring myself to type too many words while I was in my "dark place".  I really had a bad/scary few days, and didn't want to talk about it via the internets.  That's a huge sign of depression for me, since I'm generally overly honest.  It was not a good place to be.

I think I touched on it last post (I'm too tired to go look), but to recap I asked my OB for some Nuva-ring birth control to see if that would help me with my hormones (or lack thereof).  I waited until this past Sunday to put it in, and if I'm being honest with myself I knew in about 6 hours that it was a bad idea.

I am generally a happy person, with normal bouts of depression and sad days.  My life is far from unicorns and cupcakes, but it really is pretty awesome and I'm honestly happy where I am.  I did struggle with post partum depression after the birth of both boys, the second time being so awful I had to resort to bi-weekly counseling to cope.  There were some...extenuating circumstances that may or may not caused that to be worse than a normal baby blues period.  And yes, I'm still bitter.  It's going to take a long time for me to ever forgive fully and trust me when I say I'll never forget.  Some people just shouldn't exist because they are so horrible.  But, that is a story for another blog.

Anywhoo, about the time I got the full dose of hormones raging into my body, I started getting a raging headache.  I'm not very nice with a headache.  I tend to get ocular migraines, and it effects my vision and balance.  I take crab ass to the next level.  I thought "hey, it's just the first day, maybe it will settle down soon."  I was wrong.

The next few days are honestly a blur.  I don't remember much about them, except I pretty much did what I had to and not a whole lot more.  My training sessions were shit, I gained three pounds over night and I was so nauseous I could barely think about eating.  All I wanted was bread.  Too bad I didn't have any that I could eat.  I had no energy, my brain was going back and forth between pounding to foggy and I was hitting my wall.  My attitude stunk, too.  I was so irritable, and I knew it.  I have such a sweet hubby, he was very good about checking in on me.  It was probably very similar to when I was hopped up on 150mg of Clomid and progesterone - someone who has little to no hormones probably isn't going to function well on a ton of them, either.  I was so depressed, lost, confused and truthfully just so sad.  I was so, so sad...I cried a lot.  I cried at missing a stop light.  That, my friends, is ridiculous.

So, I decided that I needed to visit a "granola doctor" (chiro), otherwise known as Dr. Cindy.  ***Sidenote, I actually had an appointment to meet with this same lady years ago when trying to get pregnant with E. It was for the week I found out I was prego.  Never made it in. *** Now, I'm very open to medication, and I'm not afraid of it.  I've seen my appropriate MDs, but I really felt like it was time to take a different approach.  I'm many things but I'd never use the term "granola" for myself, but I feel in the past few months I've really moved in that direction.  Clean eating, organic living, shit - I'll be making my own soap or something like that soon enough I'm sure.  I might even try a craft from Pinterest.  I'm not even sure I know myself at this point, but I like it!  It's like Jenn 3.1, right?  Anyway, so I called and made an appointment with Dr. Cindy and headed her way on Wednesday.

I walked into her office, and immediately felt right at home.  Everyone was so nice, they have a cute new doctor working there (sorry, Sean!) and Dr. Cindy is just like the nicest person ever.  She really listened to my story, and I knew she was taking to heart all of the things we/I have gone through and genuinely wants to help.  In a nutshell, she said I was very unbalanced and we needed to get me detoxed and leveled out.  She also was concerned about the nuva-ring plus mirena combo I was rocking, and she really felt like that was just too much.  Maybe the fact that I started crying 15 different times was a tip off, I don't know.  I just like that she didn't push the issue, but totally addressed it.  (I tend to like making my own decisions and it's always best if I think it was "my idea".  Just a little hint if you don't know me well, haha.) We talked about a lot of other things, and she did these crazy tests on me to see how "off" I am.  I have a follow up appointment next Friday to go over my x-rays (yay, we can see my crazy crooked back!) and get a plan in action for a good ole fashioned detox.  It's gonna be tons o' fun!

Oh, and as soon as I got home, I yanked that damn ring out and haven't looked back.  I lost those 3 pounds again, too.  Overnight.

So, that is where we are today.  I'm back in my glass is half full mentality, and I'm so ready for my 5k this Sunday.  I had a GREAT/BADASS/I'M A ROCKSTAR run on Thursday, and it was what I needed to kick some butt this Sunday.  Running has taught me a lot of things about myself, and I truly enjoy the sense of accomplishment I have after I'm done.  I'm not fast or particularly good at it, but dammit I try really hard and that makes me a runner.  I've always wanted to say that, and it feels amazing to say it and it be true.

Angry Eyes

One of my favorite scenes in the last Toy Story movie is where Mrs. Potato Head packs her husbands "angry eyes" in his butt storage area.  It cracks me up, and I've adopted using the saying for lots of things.  Just ask my favorite Vegan, Katie!

To wrap this week up, here are some high's and low's:

High:  My thyroid levels came back NORMAL!  Praise the Lord!  No meds for me.

Low:  I'm still feeling lethargic.

High:  I got a few free samples of the Nuva-ring, and will be trying that shortly to see if the estrogen will help boost my lady-levels and make me feel better.

Low:  I had a brutal gluten attack, and recorded the crazy fast progression of my stomach.  I apologize for a few things in advance.  1.  That I look like hell.  2.  that I look like pregnant hell.  3. that there are nekkid babies in a few pictures.  I had to take them fast.  Multi-tasking at its finest!

This first picture I took a few weeks ago, when I was at 219/220.  My tummy has since gone down from this, especially the top part.  

This was 15 minutes after accidentally ingesting gluten.  I honestly had maybe 1/2 of my dinner total.  I knew after three bites things were off, but I kept eating like an idiot. 

This was taken about 20 minutes after eating.  I'm starting to feel really full, miserable and my stomach is burning at this point.  For those that have been pregnant, my belly feels the same way: ROCK HARD.  

This is 30 minutes after eating.  I'm a full-blown, totally pregnant looking person at this point.  This is me sucking in, too.  I've had two large glasses of water and I'm about to puke.  I think you can see the pain on my face.  I spent the rest of the night on the couch.

So, I'm pretty sure I have an allergy/severe intolerance to gluten.  My stomach did get a little bigger than this and I got a wicked headache to top off the evening.  I've felt pretty bad all day today.  I am scared to eat, worried that something will trigger this again. It's not a fun way to live.

I totally have my angry eyes in right now.  I'm not angry about going gluten free, I'm just angry that it's so hard to know what will make me sick and what won't.  I'm angry that I have to worry about this.  I'm angry that I can't eat a eff'in donut.   Angry I have to make yet another change in my life...

That is where I am today.  Nursing a glass of water and eating a piece of "safe" banana bread.  I promised Misty I'd be in a better mood today, but I think it's going to take another few hours to get back to happy.

Oh, and I have 8 days until my next 5k!  That part of my life is actually going well!  I'm super excited to run in a race, again - I need the goal to keep focused.  Hopefully my angry eyes won't be packed for my long run tomorrow morning!  I am always an over-packer, though...

T is for Thyroid, Tired and Trouble

I had the big doctor's appointment today.  I'll start with stating how much I love my doctor, and how grateful I am to have found her.  She is badass.

With that said, I'm pretty sure the message from Nurse Barbara was a bit skewed because Dr. D was super gungho to remove the IUD and wasn't really ready for the rest of my questions.  I was agreeable to the removal, because I'm not really a fan, but I wanted to see what she thought about PCOS/Thyroid and gluten.  I am not going to lie.  It totally feels great to have lost 18-20 pounds (depending on the day), but I REALLY feel like I have been dealt the short end of the stick with all of this crap and it should be more and I should be thinner at this point.  There.  I said it.  It SUCKS and I HATE it and I'm TIRED of the fight.  I'm also super over feeling the same way I did when we were trying to have Everett.  Bottomed out on hormones, no end in sight, long road ahead.  I asked her if she thought the IUD was the culprit, if only receiving progesterone and not estrogen was a problem.  She was pretty quick to say she really believes that the hypothyroidism is the biggest issue that I'm facing, and if we could get that adjusted back to normal things would take a turn for the better.  I asked her what she thought about the thyroid being affected by gluten and she gave me her honest answer that she doesn't really know.  She said it was a really new thing out there, there isn't a ton of research that she is aware of to back it up and she hasn't ever treated anyone personally that showed any difference either way.  She said I probably need to take up this gluten issue with a gastroenterologist to get a better answer/treatment plan.  She fully supported the change and said I look the best she's ever seen me (considering I showed up desperate and unable to have a child, then had a crazy pregnancy and finished that up with a trip up post-partum depression highway...I'm not sure that's saying much haha) and that I needed to keep up the hard work and stay focused.  She also said she'd be the one to write me a 'script  if I needed it.  I told her she was my favorite doctor.  :)

So, she prepped to remove the damn IUD, and the stupid thing is where she can't see it.  Which means...it's still there...we think.  OF COURSE it's "missing".  Seriously?  So guess who gets to spend more money on another appointment to have a sonogram to locate the missing IUD?  I just have all the luck!

I had some more blood drawn and hopefully will have results in the next day or two.  The last time I had the blood drawn I was heavy, so I'm curious to see if my levels are still high (which indicated hypothyroidism - weird) now that I've lost a few lbs.  We shall see.  I guess I just want to either cross this thyroid business off the list, or move it to the top and treat it appropriately.  I need a plan!

Stay tuned...

Let them eat cake! No, seriously...

Day 4 is coming to a close, and I'm proud to say I've been 98% Gluten free this whole time!

I really, honestly, do feel better.  And it hasn't been that difficult of a change, either.  The only awkward/man this sucks moment I had was at my friends baby shower and I couldn't eat any cake.  Oh well, I know I didn't need it anyway.  It has been a big change to go from eat what I like to eat what won't make me sick.  It has also been interesting to adjust to my new "full" feeling.  I used to eat and get almost insta-poofy tummy, so that is when I would quit.  Now that I don't really see that poofy thing going on, I have to be careful to not over eat whatever it is I am shoving in my face.  I'm craving more veggies and fruits than ever before, and I even made a "clean" chili that is super delicious!  All in all, I think it will be more or less a permanent shift in food consumption.  I've noticed I've been sleeping better, and not so tired during the day, too.  Who knows if all of this is because of the "Great Gluten Removal", but hey - I'm going to count that it is.

My 2% gluten that is remaining is coming from my Genesis Pure shake.  Man, for someone that hates shakes I'm super addicted to this one!  I can't fathom the thought of removing it from my diet right now.  It is my go-to when I don't feel like eating much, and I really don't see any side effects from it, either.  I know that it could still be causing inflamation, but for now...I'm not saying goodbye.

I went to stay with my DZ Big Sis this past Friday, and she and her husband are doing the Whole30 challenge.  I gave her a hard time at first, but after further consideration it might be the next adventure I take on.  I'm not in a place yet that I feel ready to make the commitment, but it's worth a look-see.

My next race is on the 21st, and Misty was nice enough to get a program together for me to prep for the run.  My shins have been giving me fits again, and I'm trying to baby them as little as possible but they are super tender.  I'm down to 217, but I need to kick my diet into gear and break through the 210 barrier.  I'd love to lose 20 lbs in 2 months - or, really in time for NYE.  I think 2013 is a good year not to be a fat ass anymore.  :)

The Hidden Link

Back in college, I got really sick.  Coincidentally, so did my then-best friend.  It was awful.  I couldn't keep anything in me, I lost a lot of weight and had this weird, bloated stomach that looked ridiculous.  She went to the doctor and ended up having her gallbladder removed.  I went to the doctor and never really figured out what was going on.

Eventually, a Gastroenterologist diagnosed me with intestines that were rotting away, gave me some antibiotics and sent me along my merry way.  The meds worked, don't get me wrong.  I've just never been the same again, internally.  I was only 23.

I've learned a lot of lessons in 31 years, but one I'm having a crash course in is heath and wellness.  In my twenties, I didn't really care about organic, fresh, non-processed foods.  We were broke.  Sean worked at Kraft.  We ate a lot of crackers.   We did the best we could, considered a can of green beans our "vegetables" and went on with life.  When we got off birth control and started trying for the babe that would end up being Sawyer, I had no idea what roller coaster I was about to get on.  I had been on BC since I was a teen, trying to cope with nasty cramps and insane periods, but never in my wildest dreams thought I'd have any issues getting pregnant.  And honestly, the first time, we really didn't.  It was six or seven months of trying (and one month I thought we weren't - whoops, BINGO!) before we found out we were expecting our little bundle of crazy town.  A few months later, I popped out the kid.

After Sawyer was born, I knew we'd want to have another baby relatively close together, so I opted not to have the IUD inserted then.  I got back on the pill like I was used to, and really didn't have any problems.  I lost most of the baby weight rather quickly, gained some of it back when Sawyer started eating solids but for the most part hovered around the high 190s.  Not great for someone of my height, but meh - not the worst, either.

And then, all hell broke loose.

We decided to get back off the pill and start trying for another bambino.  It went a little something like this:
Month 1: this should be so easy, I've totally already had a baby - my body will know what it's doing so fast!!

Month 2:  Ok, totally just needed a month to like...you know... get back in the groove.

Month 3-7:  Sexy time!  Whoop Whoop!  Just kidding...I'm exhausted.  Having a 2 year old is exhausting.

Month 8-12:  Maybe I should start charting?

Month 13: Seriously?  It's been officially over a year...it can't be that difficult.  Right?  Look at all of those high school chicks knocked up, its not like they know what's going on.

Month 14-17:  ok.  WTH.  Something is wrong, but too bad I have a doctor that WON'T LISTEN TO ME.

Month 18: Finally scored an appointment with m'doctor.  She tells me not to worry.  THAT I'M YOUNG.  Dumbest excuse ever.

Month 19: Psycho-dialed said dr's office, finally getting Clomid script.  This is without any blood work of ANY kind.  I think she just wants me to shut up.
***Side note, I was also given this prescription without any instructions, and when I called to get more information, I was told to look it up on the Internet.  I can't make this shit up.
****Another side note.  50mg of Clomid ain't enough.  No dice, again.

Month 20-25:  I've had enough.  I've had enough conversations with friends to realize I'm presenting a few symptoms of PCOS and want to get checked out.  Visit Dr. D, who wastes no time with testing both Sean and myself for issues.  We find out I'm the problem child (no surprise, really), got aggressive with testing and procedures and start tracking levels almost daily during my cycles.  We finally found the "cocktail" of meds that worked and our sweet baby E came into our lives after years of trying.

I go through this all because during months 20-25, I buckled down and abstained from alcohol and ate a very clean, healthy diet.  I was willing to do anything to get pregnant, and I fully believe that all of the things I gave up helped me to finally achieve a healthy pregnancy.  I also am starting to connect the dots.

I haven't felt great since I gave birth to Everett.  Besides a tremendous amount of stress that my work put upon me, I just could never really get out of a funk.  I'm not even sure I lost any baby weight, other than what was Everett and his little placenta home.  I opted to have the Mirena IUD, and I have been miserable with that, too. My diet went to hell because trying to chase after two children was more than I could deal with.  I've just felt like the last two years has been a fog.

Tonight I blew my diet.  I had a beer, some flour tortillas and rice, among other things.  My stomach is ginormous!  I texted my friend to see if all of this happens to her when she eats gluten/grains (it does). I decided to look more into things.

K mentioned reading about a link between gluten intolerance and infertility/miscarriage/PMS.  I've already been thinking about the link of Gluten to how my intestines and stomach reacts.  Is this truly the "hidden link"?  Could this really be the game changer I've felt I have needed to find?  I do know my fellow PCOS sufferer is now PCOS-free due to her drastic change into veganism.  That is huge.  I feel like becoming a vegan is a bit extreme, but maybe I need to take this a bit more seriously.  I was never tested for Celiac's when I was so sick years ago.  Maybe I should've been.

Food for thought, huh?

Here is a quick article I found about gluten and the link to the girl problems.  She lists 10 conditions.  I've had eight of them.

My Village

I have a village.

It really spans past that, though.  I have a friggin Metropolis.

Sean used to give me a hard time about the amount of time I spent on the phone with friends.  Friendship is so important to me.  I love my friends deeply and wholly, and I need that connection in my life to have my cup full. When we had the fire (almost a year ago, so crazy), those friends were our saving grace.  I had texts, calls, emails and visits from near and far all checking in, making sure we were ok.  We had clothes at our doorstep for the children within hours of the event from Sawyer's school.  My then co-workers sent a gift card that next day, and my RNDC buddies chipped in and loved us deeply, too.  We had gifts from unexpected sources, old friendships reconnected (hey, Keshia!) and a support system that I needed.  My family was awesome, too.  They let us take over their lives and move in while we picked up the pieces.  It was a stressful time, one I'm probably still having a little post-traumatic stress from, but the love was felt then and now.

I write about this now because it's what's led me to doing all of this.  

I received a text from a buddy today, congratulating me on my race and that she was proud of me and what I am doing.  I thought that was SO cool!  I'm not going to lie, the benefit of smaller clothes, overall health and goal achieving is awesome sauce.  The support and cheers, however, is the best part. I really felt that I couldn't do this.  That I would never achieve this goal.  Me?  A runner?  Puhhh-leeassse.  I've pooh-poohed doing this for years, really out of fear.  I hate failing, so why put myself in the position to do so?  Now, I'm addicted to it.  I'm freaking borderline obsessed with running.  I want to high-five all the big girls at the gym, and tell them they rock for getting out there.  It's such a crazy change I still can't even believe I just RAN A 5k!  I've already signed up for another one, too!  Who is this person???

Friends, it's hard every day.  The food challenges are still there.  But, I can do this.  I already have and will so again.  I have my village.  My village says get yo ass up and run, girl.